Fridays used to be my favorite day, my Facebook posts were all about Fridays, Fridays represented to me to drink and party (don’t get me wrong I did it during the week too). Though it was my day that I didn’t have to worry about showing up to work hungover, and pretend I was working, but really just coping. I had no patience to work and my temper was noticeable, I really hated people & their problems ugh. I look back and think how irresponsible this was, not to just my customers but to my coworkers, and employers and myself, oh and the shit show getting out the door, so irresponsible also to my son.
Today Friday is just another day. Saturday Mornings when I wake up it doesn’t matter what the weather is, it’s sunny in my world on Saturdays. For so many years I could barely get up on Saturdays, if I saw Saturday mornings it was a miracle and probably only because I had been drinking on Thursday so I didn’t drink on Friday because I was too hungover. This Saturday I will work at my business, I will run on Saturday Morning , I’ll do a Facebook Live on health and wellness. I am in Hip Sobriety School and there is a 7:00AM coaching call like holy hell I will make that on Saturday Morning.
Friday has become a day for me to celebrate Saturday Mornings hangover free, and alert and generally happy.
How do you celebrate Saturday Mornings?
I thought about this today, I hate life after I’ve been drinking. Not during not before but after, someone said the other day they hated drinking oh no, I don’t hate drinking not at all.
I hate after. After, to me is long before the hangover, after is; When the fight starts with your spouse, or friend, or the bouncer in a pub. Or you make out or go home with some random guy, or you hook up with your ex (ugh the worst). You cheat on your spouse, or you fall down in public, or decide it’s ok to walk home at 3am by yourself. Or you do dumbest thing on earth & drive, or decide to use drugs that you never would think of using when sober, or you throw up in public. It’s when you drunk text, Facebook things that are so inappropriate or plain mean or rude.
I hate life after I’ve been drinking, the stupidity levels and not caring that it allowed me to do was still indescribable to even me. Sometimes I don’t even think I would believe my own story if I was the listener. It’s so surreal. What I do try and remember are those things above, all of which I have done and worse. That’s my “why”.
All I know is we do recover and I don’t hate drinking because not everyone who drinks has these experience , I hate life after I’ve been drinking. So I don’t drink.
Have you ever noticed when the sun comes out and the itch to drink is there?
The nagging promise of the sun drenched patio’s filled with happy people drinking in the sun, bbq’s and everyone is having a fantastic drinking time, the promise of fun in the sun.
That itch is real. What isn’t real is that promise of fun and what we don’t remember or what tv/movies don’t portray is that shit show behind what actually happens to a lot of people.
Waking up with a massive hangover as you are so dehydrated from being drinking and in the sun, bank account is depleted, no idea how you got home, how 1 drink turned into 30, the neighbours are pissed off with you because of the the fight with your friend/spouse that happened, the snapchat stories that are now floating around of you being a drunk fool. The list goes on
This is the problem with the promise of fun in the sun, remember don’t romanticize it. The itch maybe real but so is the shit show. Lest we forget.