Around the beginning of May, I started feeling off, and I can’t put my finger on the perfect words to describe this period of time. I was definitely feeling depression, but not really, maybe the word more accurately to describe life was stuck.
I actually went off instagram for a bit and stopped posting as I had all of a sudden a disdain for social media, I described it as posting paralysis. I was at loss for words, I stopped blogging, writing my newsletters and took a step back. Then I felt like I had taken 100 steps back.
I gave myself a deadline of June 1st to get back writing and it passed. July 1st is now around the corner. I was going to write and inspirational post & I thought let’s just be real here. Let’s be authentic, let’s be really true. I felt off.
I continued my running journey, I’ll write more about that later. I wasn’t drinking, but my creativity was so low at one point I actually had a thought of “Fuck, why did I tell my story about becoming sober and why did I transition from fitness coaching to sober coaching”. That’s when I knew I needed to watch my step and my own sobriety could be in jeopardy. I knew it was time to be ok with being stuck. Let the feelings be what they were, stay true to myself.
The last few weeks, I all of a sudden felt great but then how do I go back to my blog, and I thought be honest, be real be true. I felt stuck, felt off, felt no creativity and now I feel better and I didn’t drink, smoke or do anything destructive to blow up my life.
I love you and am always listening