Winter Weather Triggers, are real. The snowy cold days can trigger the romantic notion of snuggling in by a warm fire drinking the evening away, it can trigger the boredom response of being housebound or even the stress trigger of having to cope with kids home from school due to snow for days on end.
Weather triggers happen and here’s some coping tools for your sobriety toolbox.
Remember weather triggers are real and to acknowledge these feelings so they aren’t just pushed aside, yes it can be uncomfortable and your skin maybe crawling, but know that drinking never makes it better.
A Sober book club came about because in early sobriety I was looking for things to do so I found a local book club and it became very apparent the women weren’t here to discuss books, but gossip, discuss their marital woes, or dating stories and DRINK. Oh the wine was flowing like I may as well have stepped into a wine bar. So I talked to a few friends and they all said yes that was how their book clubs were so much drunk fun (insert eyeball here) . One lady said that she warns her colleagues at work when book club night is in order for them to be prepared for her hangover the next day… UGH, it was disheartening, and of course I never went back & have continued to read alone on my own.
A few weeks ago, I started A Teetotalers Online Book Club I thought it might be kind of hokey, an online book club meetings are by zoom, but I like connecting with sober women, and I love to read. Then as the first meeting got closer I got nervous what if no one shows up? I already had a dialogue in my head going on, I was going to shut this meeting down if people weren’t showing up, and all the other negative self talk one can get into when you launch something and then second guess yourself.
Guess what they did show up to the Zoom Call. Guess what it was FUN, and guess what we were from ALL OVER THE WORLD AND we were connecting over sobriety, our life, and BOOKS. And we are all looking forward to next months meeting.
The book chosen to read this month is The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober, and if you would like to join us for fun in sobriety, you are more than welcome to this is just the start of something beautiful. A TEETOTALERS BOOK CLUB join here to connect with other amazing sober sisters.
Age isn’t making your boobs bigger girl, you have booze boobs, I was devastated to find this out. I had always been slender then I found alcohol. Something from my drinking days was weight gain, in fact through my life you can see in pics, you can tell during heavy drinking days by my weight. I had periods in my life where where you can tell by pics drinking wasn’t prevalent (pregnancy, post pregnancy, I was a single mom/ going to school/ working) funny when I was busy, felt like I had a purpose and passion I wasn’t drinking. I also had small boobs.
I could start to tell when I was drinking heavily and regularly I would gain weight because my bras wouldn’t fit and would become tight (especially when you are trying to stuff a C cup into an A cup) I had even started googling “do your boobs get bigger as you get older” trying to blame aging at the ripe old age of 38 years old on my boobs.
I remember in my late 30’s after I’d met my now husband one day he looked over and said “holy crap those got huge” (he’s not a boob guy) and a gf noticed she’d said to me one day don’t take this the wrong way “but your boobs look great” and I looked down and I had boobs, not just any old boobs, large boobs, I had gained just under 40lbs in under a year. None of my bras fit anymore. Let’s be honest nothing fit anymore, my underwear was digging in, my dress slacks & suits for work had succumbed to leggings with boots and blazers
Alcohol is metabolized through your liver, at a certain point it can’t metabolize anymore and your calories are stored as fat. Now add in the calories from drunk food and boom you have a perfect storm for weight gain. Pretty simple actually. Guess what boobs are made out of Fat. It’s also why you hear the term beer belly (in both men and women)
When I got sober I started listening to a podcast, it’s no longer on the air, but her intro talked about booze boobs. I’m like omg that’s me, I have booze boobs. I didn’t know this was a real thing. It is, and trust me girl if you think it’s age and you drink a bottle of wine a couple of nights a week or more trust me it’s not age, it’s booze boobs. Happy to say as I decided to pull off the 3000 extra calories a week from wine and drunk food (guess what no more booze boobs)
Yep I said it, I can’t stand it, it’s an excuse for people to drink even more, than just a regular sports game. Even when I was drinking I dreaded it, totally wonderful people and nice homes would end up in a shit storm. One party I went to a guy ended up wandering outside and passed out in a ditch in the dark, we were in Panama (think fer de lance snakes, the most venomous in the western hemisphere) and we all ended up searching for him for 2 hours . He was a older man, an engineer from Germany completely brilliant until Super Bowl.
Now I am not a football fan in general, but it was a good excuse to go to a pub or a get together with friends. I honestly never felt great after one of these parties, the food was either pub food in an overly crowded bar with kitchens doing sub par cooking, or in homes that piles of nachos, seven layer dip, gourmet hotdogs, hamburgers and a myriad of store bought wings and then there was cupcakes and sweets galore. With people swilling back beer like they are on Survivor never getting off the island and arguing about whose team is the best and most times those aren’t the two teams that are even in the Super Bowl. It really never was my jam. It was obnoxious. Being a Canadian, I never went to a Stanley Cup Party that was more gong show than I have seen on Super Bowl.
Having said that I always like to see the positive side. Super Bowl Sunday is a fabulous time to go do anything. The Gym (don’t go right before hand) and Grocery Shopping is my favorite, and I rarely grocery shop on Sundays. Then of course there is the peaceful empty house to be able to read, dance in my kitchen, prep for the week.
One thing in sobriety, I have set very clear boundaries of what I’m dong with my time. Super Bowl is not one of them, but I know my husband loves it so I will be sending him along with stuffed mushroom caps, a veggie tray and dip and of course a text for me to come pick him up.
Please always remember that stats are higher for drinking and driving accidents on this day, in fact Super Bowl Sunday is one of the highest statistics for DUI’s and drunk driving statistics, so if you or someone you love are drinking please ensure you have a way to get home.
We are Just finishing up a Dry January Challenge and some of the women are expressing they are EXHAUSTED and not feeling great, I had to think back and yes I remember this feeling, but the point is I had to think back.
Early Sobriety is tiring, not only are you trying to avoid drinking, manage emotions, but also thinking what in the hell why am I not feeling better, I’ve stopped drinking. I should feel like a million dollars, and honestly that can stem some panic, the thoughts of why should I bother if I feel like hell and am exhausted at least when I was drinking I had energy (ummm not really remember that brain is tricky, remember those debilitating hangovers)
If you want to join an awesome group of women in all stages of recovery, because being alone sucks, I have a SECRET FACEBOOK GROUP Friend me on the link and then message me to join, we discuss all things sobriety, fitness, nutrition, lifestyle the good the bad and the ugly.
How to quit drinking forever, it’s a bold statement, and really can’t be promised, but I do know that making better choices one moment at a time, is the key to sobriety.
If you are looking at quitting drinking, sobriety at first can seem so overwhelming and panicky to think I’m never going to have a drink again (no matter how bad you feel, while you have your head in your hands and are saying that out loud and making that decision). Gah the thought of never drinking again actually still panics me. That’s why I don’t think about it. I think about the here and now. In fact in both my recovery and health coaching it’s all about one moment at a time and making better choices. In fact I had a client that was in her late 50’s never married, and isn’t even open to dating but was worried about not drinking on her wedding day.
So let’s look at making better choices today, because today right now is what counts.
I hope the tips help on keeping sober, this minute, this hour, today and making better choices is key and imperative on How to Quit Drinking Forever.
As always reach out anytime
xoxo have a fit and sober day
For the first time ever I had a Instagram Memory pop up and my first memory made me sad. No I wasn’t drinking here, but shortly thereafter I did. I had about 2 months sober in this pic after the first time I’ve really tried to stop drinking for me. It was also a start of a long 7.5 month battle of chronic relapsing.
This chronic relapse memory, brought up every emotion today (even a bit of anxiety. I was on vacation, in a town in rural Panama which had been hell, for almost 3 weeks, I had no support in fact my “friends” that live there, were downright cruel to me about quitting alcohol and my husband wasn’t much better. It was awful. Sure enough we switched countries a few days later and I said “fuck it I’ll drink on vacation I’m bored without it and I’ll quit again when I get home” and I also started back up smoking. We were on vacation for until the end of February, and I had made up for my not drinking. I felt like crap when I got home, I’d gained a ton of weight in a month, I was hungover and anxious. We got home and usually we would “dry out” but it turned out the next weekend after getting home, we had brought a big bottle of vodka home because booze is cheap anywhere but Canada and I helped consume it. Then again on a Thursday because we had company in. A couple of weeks later, I went to LA to the Bliss Project for 4 days and thought that would be a great start to dry out and I didn’t drink, started to run again which just about killed me (remember I’d smoke when drinking) and I got back home and drank, this vicious cycle continued. I’d get a week in a few days in and boom I’d be right back sitting on the patio drinking and smoking. I blamed it on the good weather, the bad weather, on my husband for no support, on my period, on stress. I blamed my chronic relapsing on anything but my own actions. It took until August of 2017 I got sober, but this pic to August was one of my longest hardest journeys in my life. I wanted off planet earth, I was that depressed and deflated. I wish I had never started drinking on vacation. It was too hard to get back at it.
You can’t change yesterday, but if you are reading this, thinking you can moderate or saying fuck it I’ll start next week again. Please reread the line that said “it was the longest hardest journey in my life” and I’ve done some hard things like be a single mom with no child support and live by the beach in one of the most expensive cities in North America, go back to school at the age of 30, waitressed nights, dated addicts. This was the toughest, getting sober again.
About 7 Years ago when I decided to lose weight, I put myself on a restrictive diet (like most people do and before, I knew better), and of course that included no booze, after about 1.5 months I was out and treated myself to cocktails, cigarettes and all the food and then I found it harder to not drink and stay on a restricted diet (because ultimately real life doesn’t allow restrictive diets forever) and by the end of my drinking career 4 years later, we had moved, my stress levels were at an all time high, I was barely making it to the gym. My mental & physical health were suffering horribly. I then started to look at my drinking it took me another 1.5 to get continuous sobriety but in the mean time I worked on getting sober and got my butt back to the gym.
REDUCED CRAVINGS: This is a bonus Tip and it combines all of the above, and really one of the biggest benefits how fitness helped me give up the booze. It has reduced cravings. Fitness has given me something to do, with like minded people, while making me feel good, It’s something healthy do during the “witching hour” and helps me sleep all which relieves cravings.
Fitness & Health has played a big part in my sobriety journey. If you have any questions or want to incorporate fitness into your journey reach out to me. Also on my Instagram, I post lots of great exercises, food and life as well as on my Youtube channel my exercises from my free fit and sober challenge in December are posted.
The horror, right. I don’t track days sober. I have been seeing all over instagram, people holding up signs and celebrating and getting hundreds of likes. I am also in a couple of Facebook Sobriety Groups and a few months ago one woman posted she was celebrating she will have 500 days sober. I thought do I have 500 Days Sober? I don’t know. I had made a conscious decision last time I got sober not to track how many days I had sober.
Ok now you know Why I Don’t Track How Many Days I Have Sober. My sobriety date is the first Saturday in August of 2017 I do know that much. If you are feeling any of the feelings up top, I’m telling you it’s time to start creating a life you love. Here’s what I did at first, instead of tracking every single day, hour, minute second. I bought a planner just a cheap weekly one, and I’d write my gratitude in it daily 3 things I was grateful for . Then I would mark off by the week, I started this planner at approximately 4 weeks sober, and I marked it off by the week and at 4 weeks, 6 weeks, 8 weeks I would reward myself. With experiences, I did a sensory deprivation float, went to baby goat yoga, and booked a yoga retreat. I looked back at my planner and around week 22 I had stopped writing in the weeks, faithfully but not intentionally did I quit writing and I see I wrote week 25, 29 and 30 and that was the end of counting. It just petered out.
Today I count today as sober, I write daily my gratitudes (3 at then end of every day and that includes: grateful I am sober today. We all have just 24 hours including Beyonce, no more no less. So enjoy today with gratitude, be happy to be sober, just for today, and know that life is more than just about being sober, it’s about creating a life of happiness, gratitude, goals, family, love, kindness, memories, activities and health and my sobriety roles into all of that. Instead of counting the days behind or counting the hours ahead, try and be present for now.
Have a fit and sober day
When I first got sober, I wrote this blog post bored in sobriety. I had no friends that were sober, my husband isn’t sober, and I was bored. I have a girlfriend that is now going through the same thing, she doesn’t want to go to meetings, she has a young child at home and she’s bored. We talk a lot and we both read a lot and talk about books, so she said to me why don’t you do a sober book club.
So I did, We officially have launched A Teetotalers Book Club, Online and FREE, for women in recovery. You can be at any place in your recovery, the only requirement is you show up for the Book Club Sober and you want to connect with other amazing women. CLICK HERE TO JOIN US