I thought about this today, I hate life after I’ve been drinking. Not during not before but after, someone said the other day they hated drinking oh no, I don’t hate drinking not at all.
I hate after. After, to me is long before the hangover, after is; When the fight starts with your spouse, or friend, or the bouncer in a pub. Or you make out or go home with some random guy, or you hook up with your ex (ugh the worst). You cheat on your spouse, or you fall down in public, or decide it’s ok to walk home at 3am by yourself. Or you do dumbest thing on earth & drive, or decide to use drugs that you never would think of using when sober, or you throw up in public. It’s when you drunk text, Facebook things that are so inappropriate or plain mean or rude.
I hate life after I’ve been drinking, the stupidity levels and not caring that it allowed me to do was still indescribable to even me. Sometimes I don’t even think I would believe my own story if I was the listener. It’s so surreal. What I do try and remember are those things above, all of which I have done and worse. That’s my “why”.
All I know is we do recover and I don’t hate drinking because not everyone who drinks has these experience , I hate life after I’ve been drinking. So I don’t drink.